I Have Skills

My friends took me out last night for my last voyage into the wild frontier. I have no idea what that means, but I thought it sounded all adventurous, so I used it. I have a flare for the dramatic.
We enjoyed a small drink, lots of laughs, light hearted conversation, and I learned I had new skills.
Unbeknown to me, there are cherry-stem-tongue-tying skills out there. I think we are established I cannot take a dare or challenge. I am quite possibly the most competitive person on the face of this planet. As a matter of fact, I am the most competitive in the universe!
I have never heard of such a talent. If I knew this existed I sooooo would have tried out for Miss America. The only thing standing in my way was the fact that I had NO talent.....and the beauty part...but those are small things.
Just look at this. I am sure it would have secured me the crown.
Better luck next time. Thanks girls. I love you all.

PS ! MORE NEWS TOMORROW ABOUT INDIANA JONES!!!!