Tuesday, May 20, 2008

You Say Poe TATE Oh, I Say Poe TOT Oh

I am the world's worst pronouncer. I cannot say a phrase or word right to save my life. I first realized this when I was in sixth grade and said the word "tarlit." I thought this is how you said the ceramic bowl of waste collection. Seriously, I tell no lies.

Then it went on to "worsh" and "armwire" and inevitably "crik" Yes, my name is Country Girl and I cannot pronounce words correctly. I am a po 'nouner of vo ka boo larry.

But none of this even comes close to the time I transferred my ignorance to a spelling mishap. I died a million deaths this day and have never been the same. Seriously. Honest to Blog!

So, I being the helper that I am (translate into: I want to be in everybody's business so I volunteer for stuff to get the inside scoop), I volunteered to write the punch list for a multimillion dollar building project we were doing at church. I followed the little building people around and tried to decipher words like anchor bolts and ballast and hammer. I went back to my office and typed the list up. Spell check caught 8,421 mistakes.

I made 14 copies of my list (one for every staff pastor and assistant) and placed my crisp clean copies into everyone's box. I saw my Senior Pastor pull it out and start reviewing it.

Soon, the Children's Pastor came running in grinning from ear to ear.

"You run spell check County Girl?"

I felt my heart race and skip all around, "Yeah, why?"

As he pointed down to #42, he asked, "What are we going to do about the cock around the basketball courts?"

GULP! So it can also be caulk? Seriously, who knows this tiny factoid?

2 comments:

Tiger Lamb Girl said...

Gulp. I'm kinda mortified for you.

but still.....lol

Steve said...

you just went PG-13....naw, that is funny!