Sunday, June 29, 2008

I Am The Biggest Dork Ev-er

Upon NUMEROUS recommendations, I rented Lars and the Real Girl. Now here is the the unfiltered truth about me and movies. It is kinda embarrassing but if I can't tell you, my closest friends, then who can I tell? My therapist? Uhmmm...nope! Thanks for saving me thousands.

When it comes to movies I really can only rent two kinds - comedy and chick flicks. Why? Why am I limited to only these categories?

I am a crier. I mean an in-depth crier. I get emotionally involved in movies. I mean DEEPLY involved. I am there. I am transported. I become BFF's with the characters. I take them home with me in my empty popcorn bucket.

Take Stepmom for example. I wept. I mean uncontrollably wept. To the point strangers in the theater were turning around checking on me. Offering me tissues and patting my back. I mean, how could I bear to see Susan Sarandon wither away as she made the best of a horrible situation? And the quilts? Oh the quilts. And Julia Roberts? She truly did care. Oh, I am tellin ya, for months I worried about Anna and Ben. Seriously. I still think about them today-- ten years later. Are they married? Kids? Do they carry on their mother's traditions? Do they sing Marvin and Tammy with their kids and hairbrushes? Do they have their quilts hung on the wall or draped on their newborns cradle? Ah, it took an awful, emotional toll on me.

Then My Life. I saw this my junior year of high school with my high school boyfriend, Jason. And I could not handle it and he did not know how to handle me. I was sobbing uncontrollably. I mean Michael Keaton has a wonderful life, gorgeous wife, baby on the way, then he finds out he only has months to live. And he begins a video diary for the wisdom he must pass down to his unborn son. I remember when he was teaching him to shave, it was more than I could take. My chest was heaving and I was spewing all kinds of snot and tears. Shortly after this emotional episode, I received one of my many break-ups. I can understand why.

I could go on and on, but I have learned that I cannot handle this emotional baggage in my life. I attach myself to these people and it truly affects me. So I limit myself only to comedies and chick flicks. Amen.

So when the COMEDY of Lars and the Real Girl was recommended to me, I had no qualms about renting it. In this comedy, Lars is a painfully shy man in a small northern town who finally brings home the girl of his dreams to his elated brother and sister-in-law's home. But there is a slight problem --she's not real. To the complete shock and surprise of his brother and sister-in-law, she is an Internet ordered sex doll. Although sex is not what Lars has in mind, but rather someone to love and relate to. His sister-in-law is worried for him, his brother thinks he is nuts.

But here is what gets me....although this is absolutely hilarious and has you busting a gut at the CRAZINESS of it all...the entire town goes along with his delusion. They do this in support of this sweet /slightly odd boy that they've always loved. The community actually begins to act kindly towards Bianca, treating her as a real woman and makes friends with her. Some women give her a makeover, while others take her to volunteer at the hospital reading stories to children, and others even give her a job as a model in a clothing store. Then the town ladies bake casseroles and come to sit with Lars during her final days and even show up to the most beautiful funeral.

I could feel my eyes start to burn and that big lump come in my throat while everyone else in the house was busting a gut. I could not help it -- the love this town showed. They did all this because they did not judge Lars, but loved him. It was so selfless.

Someone PLEASE point me in the direction of this town. I will move tomorrow. Is this not the most endearing thing you have ever seen? Ev-er? I wept...and this was not a pretty sight. This was actually an hour AFTER the move was over...and I still had spurts of uncontrollable weeping. Oh, the people were so accepting and I want to be just like them -- minus the buns and knitting. So, go forth and see this movie...but bring tissues. Cause when you laugh and cry at the same inevitable spew snot. At least this what I hear.


Kim said...

...with the biggest (dork) heart!

I love finding truth in movies!

Shhh...don't tell anyone, but I cried for this same reason during Finding Nemo!

Becky :) said...

OMG......I'm so glad that I am not the only one like this.
I only like to rent comedies and chick flicks too. Unfortunately sometimes they can come hand in hand. I just saw P.S. I Love You a couple of weeks ago and I bawled like a little baby. I had even read the book and knew what was coming.
Then I rent 27 Dresses and laugh my butt off but then end up crying in some spots. And just like you I cry uncontrollable.
I haven't seen the movie you just saw but I think now I will.
Glad that we could all help with the therapy. I know I feel better having said all that. :-)

Working Mom said...

Did you cry when Wilson floated out to sea on Castaway? I did.

My all time biggest uncontrollable sobfest movie ever?: The Bridges of Madison County. I have goosebumps just thinking about it. That scene at the end when they're in the trucks and it's raining and he's waiting to see if she'll get out and come with him, and she's just sitting there next to her husband trying not to cry in front of him, and he reluctantly drives away without her....UUUGGGHHH!!!! Clint Eastwood drives away with a piece of my soul everytime I watch it, which isn't very often.

Simply Me... said...

I love that movie I posted about it on my blog, I've seen it 3 times now and would watch it again, oh if life was that simple! and I also love stepmom! I even eyed at the sex in the city movie! I'm a cryer that's for sure. Have you seen bucket list? you will cry! I mean cry! the ugly cry as Oprah would say!!! we have it coming tomorrow from block buster!have a great day and I'm sure I'll see you later! Lanny:)

Working Mom said...

you gotta watch it. just block out some time knowing that you will be a miserable sobbing mess. but you have to see it at least once. it's a must.

oh, and The Notebook - DUH! another major one. Mr. Clean and I watched it and we were both a mess. he wanted to watch it again right then! i was like NO WAY! i can't handle that! he's a softie like that though.

Working Mom said...

ok, and also, my biggest movie cry EVER - Passion of the Christ. saw it one time. i was speechless for a few hours after. (and it's rare for me to be speechless.)

The Kelso-Winter Family said...

new rental recs: 1) Amelie and 2) Saving Grace.. first one is comedy AND sorta love story...2nd one is just plain funny...i even cried at that stupid SEx and the City... but i wanted her to go back and pick Aidan... if only i had a good memory i've got tons more picks...think think..oh..the Glass House is pretty good too.

Pony Girl said...

I'm the same way, if it's not comedy, chick flick, or a combination of the two, I stay home and pop in a DVD that is.
That movie about Lars sounds interesting, I will have to add it to my summer movie list!