Sunday, June 8, 2008


We packed our bags up Sunday morning and headed for a day at the beach. I know I am unemployed and spend my days painting my toenails and barking orders at my {make-believe} Cabana Boy, but life is stressful and I needed a break. Please don't judge me. So off we went.

We also need to conquer Baby Twerp's fear of water. I think he is part cat. Now he loves the bathtub, but as soon as we get near anything that remotely looks like larger pools of water he begins repeating over and over, "I don't dike dat. I don't dike dat." I know, he also has issues with speech, but I can only deal with one at a time people. And I definitely think fear of water is a priority here people. See why I need the beach?

This is Indiana Jones and Baby Twerp in their normal "I AM having fun poses." They are anti-social. I do not have an ounce of antisocialness in my body. Not even a molecule or an atom or a molecular species...I have no clue what I am saying. Middle Twerp needed no assistance or encouragement to jump in. But Baby Twerp was another story. I started with water guns. Not like threatening with them, but offering them as gifts -- just thought I should clarify. What little boy would not jump in the warm refreshing water for a water gun?
Uhm, the answer would be Baby Twerp. I then began to encourage and negotiate. I have great negotiation skills. This comes in so handy for all those hostage situations I intervene in. Middle Twerp showed him how it was done....Like this Baby Twerp...See? Come join me Baby Twerp!I decided we were getting no where after an hour, so I just picked him up and carried him in. You would have thought I was dangling him over a pit on angry crocodile or a vat of acid or making him listen to Barry Manilow. Once we finally made it back safely to shore, he was fighting mad. And left me. He walked right off and LEFT ME. Where is the love?Middle Twerp tried to come in and talk some sense into him. It did no good...he keep walking so I followed, because I cannot stand for someone to be mad at me. I am a lover, not a fighter.Baby Twerp needed to find something safe and secure and in his comfort zone. I understand. For these same reasons, I never do pinks in lip glosses. They are not safe and secure and do not fit into my comfort level.

This is what Baby Twerp found that would fit for him This was the level of water he was willing to commit to. I sat back in the shade and let Indiana Jones take over. Look how calm and in charge he looks. What is up with that pose? Is he trying to pick up hot chicks? What is up with that? We are so leaving. Pack up Twerps. Ah, naa... He came back to me....shew. All in all, we are worn out, but had a great day. However, we are no closer to Baby Twerp training for the Olympic Swim Team. Sigh.


Kim said...

Normally I'm not a fan of sagging, but I dooo love Baby Twerp's board shorts and pull-ups!

Working Mom said...

I'm with Kim. Baby Twerp is looking kinda gangsta, but in a cute, precious, toddler sorta way!

Dreams of a Country Girl said...

Kim -- I as worried at first about what you were calling saggy - glad is was just Baby Twerp's pants. :o)

Scrappy Girl said...

I officially hate you! LOL! Although you boosted my dieting motivation.