Tuesday, September 16, 2008

Dreams of a Country Girl...Literally

I dream pretty much the same way I write - sporadic, pointless, and embarrassing.

But I had two reoccurring dreams as a kid that I had completely forgotten about until this morning. Why? Cause I swear by all that is holy and just....and Dr Pepper lip gloss and if I am lying let me get canker sores....that I dreamed BOTH OF MY CHILDHOOD DREAMS LAST NIGHT. I kid you not.

Country Girl has two big issues in her life (well, two is all we can address in this post.)

I am a big chicken and I HATE to be by myself. This is why when I go home to visit, I still have my mom come in the bathroom and talk to me while I take a shower. And while I make one of my Twerps sleep with me when Indiana Jones is out of town. And also why I jump at ducks swimming in a river, but that is another story for another day.

But one of the things that just plagues my fears is the thought that someone is under my bed waiting to slash my ankles before I can safely arrive into my bed. I have had this fear as long as I can remember and it all started with this dream. This same dream the resurfaced its ugly reptile head last night after 13 years of hibernation.

It starts off with me wearing the cutest summer cotton white gown with a peasant neckline -yes, this was also in my dreams at age 6 - and my hair is hot rolled and pulled over my right shoulder. These details are not important to the story, but I like to share the inner most moments of my life.

And I have just finished brushing my teeth and going to the bathroom and I know the inevitable is awaiting me. I am gonna have to turn off the light and then get into bed. And I am scared to death there is someone under my bed.

So I flip the light switch off and try to get close enough to the bed to jump in, but far enough away to avoid extensions of arms with knives.

I am on my last step and out comes this reptile arm with a machete that with one single swipe cuts both my feet off at the ankles.

And as I fall to the floor, I notice how my feet look like I have taken them off and placed them neatly by the bedside...like slippers awaiting my morning arrival, but with blood.

Anyhoo...then this giant lizard with a white button up shirt that has turned yellow with age, comes out and swallows me whole.

Then my mom comes in and turns on the light (I can tell this because the lizard's belly lights up inside and I can see the veins and capillaries inside his stomach) and she asks the lizard if everything is okay.

He shakes his head yes while I beat on his belly that sounds like an empty tin drum and scream HELP MOM! MOM HEEELLLLLP!

My mom says OKAY well keep it down, turns off the light, and leaves.

Exact same dream. Exact same details. Except one things varies...sometimes he is wearing a pocket protector.

Anyhoo, I have no clue where this comes from and the last time I remember dreaming it was in college sleeping on the floor of my sorority sister, Chelli's, room. I was wearing a navy blue GAP sweatshirt to bed....how I remember this I do not know.

But I need an interpreter of WHAT this dream means and WHY it resurfaced after 13 years of hibernation. Then, I can sleep better tonight.

Thanks in advance, you modern day Daniels. I love you more than words can say.

Big Pink Fuzzy Heart With Glitter,

P.S. I will never throw you in prison...or a lion's den. Even if you tell me a plague is coming. I promise. I am a lover, not a fighter.


Kim said...

Sorry, I ain't got no handwriting on my wall for ya!

Oh, and definitely the queso! We single girls gotta get passionate kisses any way we can!

Brandy said...

I am also afraid of the dark...I just came home to my fiances house, alone, with no one here! I just checked every room and every closet...then realized that while I was checking the kitchen, whoever Im looking for could have ran across the dining room, into the office and down the hall...so my hunt had to start all over again! I also just turned around to make sure that "he" is not standing over my shoulder reading this! What in the world would I possibly do if I actually found whoever it is Im looking for???
I make matters worse, there is not a blind or curtain on the kitchen window so I have to avoid the kitchen, which is nearly impossible!!!

~Mad said...

Check out Chesapeake Bay woman's comment at http://thementalpausechronicles.blogspot.com/

- I am sure she would interpret your dream! She did a great job for Mental Pause Momma.



Jenifer said...

I used to jump into bed from afar as well. I just knew something was under there waiting to get me. No idea on the interpretation though....

Tracie said...

I don't know what your dream means, but I also, since I was a child, have been afraid of the boogy man under my bed going to slash my ankes and then too of my bed being filled with spiders & snakes when I pull the covers back which is why I have to do it with the light on. Hope you have happy dreams tonight!

The Kelso-Winter Family said...

i'm gonna check out dream interpreter websites but sometimes it's just your subconcious sneaking up to the fore. sometimes if hubby away i sleep with all the lights on and put an eye cover over my eyes..and then wake up at every smidgey little noise. did someone when you were little scare you from under your bed cause that happened to me!.. i dream of lizards on the wall too but not in such detail as you... gee..no help at all am I? at least you had a 13 year reprieve!?

The Kelso-Winter Family said...

p.s. you won the prize on my blog..go see what it is!

elb said...

According to dreammoods.com:

To dream that your legs are wounded or crippled, signifies a lack of balance, autonomy, or independence in your life. You may be unable or unwilling to stand up for yourself. Perhaps you are lacking courage and refuse to make a stand.

To see a lizard in your dream, signifies your primal instincts and reactions toward sex, food, etc. and your anxieties toward these feelings. The lizard can also be representative of a person who you view as cold-blooded, fearful, or thick-skinned. On a more positive note, the lizard also symbolizes emerging creativity, renewal, and revitalization. It may also suggest that you are well-grounded.

I hope that helps?

Marchelle said...

it means that on frog-disecting-day you developed a crush on your biology teacher (white shirt, pocket protector & all.) nevermind that you started having this dream at 6 yrs old. it was an omen.

so what was the other dream??

i sometimes dream that my teeth are all loose and falling out, like on Beetlejuice when they are doing the sceance and Adam is all decayed and tries to say "Beetlejuice" 3x.
except i'm not dead and decaying.

Lo said...

i am TERRIBLY frightened of the dark. so bad that i have to have this light-trail thing going on with the lights in my house. my house is lofted, so i have to turn off the kitchen light first after turning on the living room light, then the foyer light before the living room light goes off, then i can go upstairs and then the upstairs hall light goes on, then the foyer light goes off, then i turn on the bedroom and bathroom lights on, and then trun off the hallway light. then when i'm done in the bathroom i have to turn off the bathroom light and then dash into bed, and THEN i turn off the bedroom light MANUALLY by pulling the floor lamp over to me and turning it off there.

i am so, so terrified of a serial killer hiding, that i've even plotted out HIDING SPOTS in my house in case it's ever broken in to!!!!

jeez. i'm a big scaredy cat.

Jenn said...

I also have irrational fears of the dark, and even run and jump on the bed from time to time, depending on how much I let my fear control me. You are not alone. :)

Adrenalynn said...

I have had the same horrible dream ever since I was 10 and got braces put on my teeth; that I would bite my teeth together so hard in my sleep that they would break. I'm actually shivering right now at the very thought!