Thursday, October 9, 2008

Help a Girlfriend Out

If you have deep moral objections to children in their skivvies or a propensity to think parents that take pics of their toddlers half dressed is a disgrace to mankind, then please...shut this silly old blog down now. Go gather hairballs out of your lint trap or scrape toddler boogers off the bathroom wall or pick the hairs from behind the toilet. But whatever you do, for the love of sweet Jesus, do not read any farther...or is it further...Oh, just depart from me you workers of iniquity. I know you not.


But just realize that if I prohibit taking any pics of my kids unless they are completely dressed, I will only have four pics of each Twerp when they turn five. Because none of my Twerps are ever fully dressed at any given moment. Except when we all circled round the table for our daily Bible study and prayer...with fasting. Cause we do that...everday. I have just missed the last few. Amen.
Anyhoo, Baby Twerp had a doctor's appointment and they made hum strip down to his skivvies. Which he had no issue with whatsoever. It actually made him feel quite at home.
But as a mother of boys, there are things I just don't get. Cause I am all about glitter and unicorns and spirit fingers and puffy things and cuzzles. And I need help understanding these male testosterone pockets that have invaded my pink glitter world.

Please help me to understand WHY WHY WHY if there is ever a free hand on one of my male Twerps, you can find it here?
Or as soon as any outfit is placed upon their body, whether it be blue or pink or shorts or ski suits or toilet paper wraps....
It immediately becomes a kung-fu fighting warrior suit. Which is followed by kicks and grunts and moans that I could never intimidate.
Or how a tape measure instantly becomes a fishing pole...
Which OF COURSE after about 3 minutes very predictably becomes a...
Tae Kwon Do Ninja sword. Obviously.
So please help a unicorn lovin puffy paint girl out.

10 comments:

Jenn said...

My son is barely over a year old and the second that diaper comes off, his free hand is down in "the area". I do not understand it and I always push his hand away. I feel your pain!!

Sondre Lyn said...

Oh Man, is that cute or what! I remember those days... :D

Lo said...

okay, i have one of these at home- by 'one of these' i mean my husband, who is 25 years grown.

and still, whenever he has a free hand, you can find it. chillin' in his pants. NOT GRABBING ANYTHING, no, just sitting there tucked in the waistband. when i ask him why he must STICK HIS HAND down his PANTS, he says, 'oh, how'd that get in there?'

sigh. i have no words of wisdom to offer you, bc i'm still tryin' to figure it out myself.

spanki said...

it must be a boy thing! i was looking back for old pics and they are all half dressed! i am really surprised cps was never called on my butt bearing boys!

Anonymous said...

If you discover the answer to this mystery please let me know. I have been wondering this very thing for 7 years now.

The Kelso-Winter Family said...

note to moms: don't even notice that hand down pants - worry if they don't cause it's totally normal. note to CG: You, my dear are the victim of Twerp Testosterone..someday you'll have daughters-in-law to help balance.

Anonymous said...

he is so cute!! I love that you make everyday moments silly :) what a fun mom your twerps have.

MauritaMason said...

Oh, lordy. I had three of my own and I can't tell you anything. Except you're lucky the hand is in the back.

Tracie said...

Sorry I have girls!

Anonymous said...

Yup, same thing here!