In Sickness and In Health...

I'm sick. Does anyone want to hear about my swollen glands and mucus infested membranes? I think it might be malaria or possibly small pox. Don't send flowers. I will set up a memorial scholarship fund. This always seemed like the more sensible thing to do. Why waste all that money on flowers that will die anyways? I think that is Indiana Jones' motto too, "Why waste all that money on trying to make me look young and purty, I am just going to get old, wrinkly, and die anyways."

Do you think I should donate my body to science? You think they will practice liposuction on me? If so, I want a boob job too. I think I should at least look good if I am going to be naked all the time. I mean wouldn't you want someone working on you that had practice? I will be the one to sacrifice for you ladies. Never fear, I will be here for you. In sickness and in health, 'til death do us part.