Wednesday, May 26, 2010

Without The Heart We Are All Hopeless

Okay -- there are two things I am just dying to get out. It is like a bad bean burrito all inside me and IT MUST COME OUT. So sorry -- but it is true. And you know it. And if you are all shocked and embarrassed then you do not have a Mexican monster within you that must be tamed on a weekly basis....sometimes daily....sometimes hourly. Hypothetically speaking of course. Amen.

Sorry, I digress. Like I said there are two things I must address right this instant or I may explode into a fine pink glitter powder and it would be a shame and all cause no one is around to witness it or get in on video for YouTube and all - cause we all know I was born for attention.

Item #1 Up for Bid:

1. Momma.

As you are aware I use the phrase quite often. Not only is it what my children call me, but it is what I call the woman who bore me and I write it forty eleven times a day.

Anyhoo, many of you have emailed and/or commented me that it is Mama. And I would first like to say - have I ever spelled or pronounced anything right in my born days? But I still appreciate your desire to refine me and make me where you could take me out in public. But I might be too far gone. Take "rural" for example. That's all. Thank you and good night.

I know you all have the sweetest spirits here and are trying to make me not look dumb. And I appreciate it. Really, I do. But it's more than you can handle. Also, this is really how we say it at our house. Mom ma. Seriously. I know. You are shaking your heads. I can feel it in my soul. But it is the honest to God's truth. I hide my face in shame. Rural.

Okay -- now I must move on. #2 is important. Not that #1 was not important. It was. Especially for all you grammar and English teachers out there. I know. And I love and embrace each of you. Muh wah!

But this one -- this one is gonna make me cry -- like Steel Magnolias -- when she falls outside and the spaghetti sauce is boiling over and the baby is crying and Sally Fields finds her. Oh my my my.

Or in My Life when Michael Keaton is videoing himself shaving as the lesson to his unborn son cause he is not going to live long enough to see his child born.

Or in Step Mom -- when Susan Sarandon realizes Julia Roberts is going to raise her children so she beings to teach and train her -- oh stick a fork in me honey child -- I AM DONE!

Anyhoo -- Sorry, I digress. My #2 important thing that I must share with you right this instant.

#2. If you know someone. Truly really really know someone - You love them. It is true.

I am not saying you like them.

I am not saying you agree with them.

I am not saying you understand them.

But You Love Them.

It's true.

You know when you are watching a movie and you hate the villain? Despise them? Can't relate or understand WHY? But then they flash back to show you where they have been and what they have endured? They show you them as a child -- an innocent sweet baby. They show you their hurts. Their point of view. You see life from -- well -- from their lens.

Suddenly, your heart grows soft -- and while you still don't condone what they have done, you somehow somewhere have found compassion. And understanding. And a spark of love.

Like Darth Vader. Remember when Vader is shown as his former self, Anakin Skywalker, a slave boy who eventually becomes a Jedi , and later, a hero . Then he falls to the dark side and I just want to snatch him up cause we all know he just needed a good Momma. It's true. After that. I loved him.

And who watches Desperate Housewives? Remember Eddie - the serial killer on Wisteria Lane? And his Momma was abusive and an alcoholic? Sure we don't condone his actions -- but I am sorry - I still love Eddie. He needed his Momma. He didn't have the same fair change in life.

Or Eldest Twerp's momma. You might judge and wonder how she could give ET up for adoption. But after you meet her -- and KNOW her -- you realize she is the most selfless and brave woman you will ever meet. Ever. Amen.

Anyhoo -- you like people in movies and on TV shows -- even when they are annoying or awful or evil. You like them and I would say even love them cause you SEE them. You see them behind the scenes. You see them on the weekends. You see them at home. You see their fears and the why. You see them and you understand them and you love them.

You see life through their lens. You put on the glasses of their life and you feel compassion. You love.

It's like those mommas or sisters who never give up on their sons and brothers. Cause they know where they have been. And we know they are not where they need to be -- but thank God they are not where they use to be.

Anyhoo -- I say all that to say this.

For me (and me only) - I stopped this week. I stopped and looked a little deeper into a few people's lives. A few people that I thought might be selfish and hateful. And I looked at them like some one's child. I saw their point of view. Their hurts. Their insecurities. Their fears.

I believed the best in them.

And suddenly, without me even realizing it, I understood. I still didn't agree with their actions. But I loved them and had compassion for them.

Cause through their lens -- their intentions were right. Their actions? Not so much. But I started judging them on their intentions not their actions -- which is what I hope everyone does for me too.

Anyhoo -- no real point here other than to say -- FOR ME, I forget the heart sometimes. And without the heart, we are all hopeless. I hope to SEE people for WHO they are, not WHAT they do.

That's all.

Now go hug your Mommas.


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