I am a perfectionist, this I know to be true. I am always looking for better, because good is, well, just not good enough. Life is good for me, but could it be better? This is the question that always plagues me. Am I missing something? What if I am just doing okay and perfection is out there? Here we go with discontented again. Grrrr.
I have three BEAUTIFUL kids. I stayed home for awhile, I felt like I was missing something. I went to work part-time—unfulfilling. Now I truly have a dream job, a dreamy husband and the kids I have always dreamed of; yet, this is not it.
Will I ever get to good enough? Or will there always be something better? Discontented again.
I have a new lofty dream. This fulfills me in some strange way. I have to have something to reach for, something to strive for, something to obtain. I want a country life. I want to can green beans, hang cloths on the line, and listen to crickets for entertainment. I want to live in a town so small that we know everybody’s business and linage, but no one dare to make fun of us because we are all family. I want to smell manure and like it in some strange way. I want it to take 20 minutes to drive to get your groceries and I do not want it to be a special event to see a deer or have a turtle in your backyard. I want to live where if someone found my house they would be lost! But would I be discontented because no Starbuck’s would be close and where would I wear my new black Nine West pumps? What is wrong with me! What do I want?