Silver Sneaker's Smack Down

This is Baby Twerp's reaction to pulling into the YMCA parking lot. He starts screaming, I don't want to go to class. But only I can understand my speech-impediment laden child. Which works to my benefit when I tell the teachers in the class he just hates knowing he will only be in here for an hour. It breaks his heart.

Cause if the child care knows why he is throwing a fit, they might not take him. And then I would not be able to do my yoga with my senior citizen class mates. And then I would have no adult social interaction for the week. And then I would shrivel up and die like a menopausal fallopian tube. Sorry.

But let me tell you there was some d-r-a-m-a at the silver sneakers today. I mean some DRAMA. I never realized how senior citizens do not like themselves some change. And how brutal they can be.

Sally, our hippie instructor, is in Florida on vaca for the next two week and these ladies are unforgiving. How dare she take vaca in the middle of the summer while YOGA is goin on...sheesh. It is like she did not even think about us, her once a week Silver Sneakers Yoga class.

And to make matters worse she got Danielle as her replacement. Cute. Adorable. Danielle. And although she is VERY good, she is nothing like Sally and well, she is different. And this is coming from women who still wear the same pants from 1962. And Danielle was not even alive in 1962.

Where Sally was soft spoken, relaxing, sure of herself, and predictable -- Danielle was cheerleader-ish, energizing, self conscience, and a fly by the seat of her pants kinda girl. I love Danielle. And let me tell you she pushed those ladies -- seriously. I am SO not lying when I say I pulled a muscle in my ring toe on my left foot -- seriously. And those ladies did not like to be pushed.

Margie did not even show up she was so out of kilter, and Suzie showed up late and DID NOT HAVE A CHAIR. And Martha, whose husband usually just drops her off, made Elbert stay just in case she wanted to leave early. Elbert stared at everyone dirriere. It made me giggle. But it all ended when Daniella made us all show her our...gulp...tightened gluteus maximus, Elbert was in heaven, but the rest of the ladies though this to be atrociously vulgar. And when she challenged Ethel that she was not tightening to her fullest extent, I thought I was gonna have a riot on my hands.

Gosh, I can't wait until next week.

PS I took Baby Twerp to the library to get tractor and Clifford books after he endured the torture chamber of the YMCA. So don't feel too sorry for him.