The Ridiculously Simple Hair Post

Okay we have been over the necessities in Vanity Hair. This is only what I use and if you have something that works better for you, then heavens to Betsy, use it. My hair is not oily so some have better results with other brands.

But this. This beautiful sweetie. He is just angelic. And he gets really really really hot. So be careful. And if you got some money burning a hole in your pocket, buy him. And love him for who he is...I also have a Chi, but they do not know about each other. I am trusting you will keep my secret. Here is me straight out of the shower [I dressed first] and right after I blew dry my hair. I do nothing special in blow drying my hair. Just make sure it is completely blown dry.

I use no fancy brushes or creams. I actually use no brushes at all. I just finger comb it as I blow it dry. Sometimes I turn my head upside down, sometimes I sit criss cross apple sauce in the floor, sometimes I shave my legs in the sink...I am a big multitasker like that and all.

But as you can see, there is nothing spectacular going on here. And my neck always turns red after the 8.421 hours it takes to blow dry my hair. Then I use a Goody hair twist to put up 75% of my hair. The bottom part of my hair can be frizzy so I try to section this part off from the rest. The smaller amount you leave hanging down the better.
Then I start with a small section to curl. Normally the part hanging down is broken down into 4-6 sections. The smaller the sections, the better the curl. Start smaller, you can always go bigger.
I start at the scalp and pull the curling iron to the ends.
Then I begin to curl up in a spiral motion.
Go all the way to your scalp. But don't touch it cause it is seriously hot.

And then DO NOT RELEASE THE HANDLE ALL THE WAY, but rather a teeny itty bitty bit and PULL THE CURLING IRON DOWN, keeping the spiral in tact...Let's take a look.


Now do it all over again.

Someone please tell me why my mouth is open in EVERY one of these pics?

Notice how if you pull it down it keeps the spiral. That is what we want. This should be an Olympic sport.
Although I would only get a 5.6 because of my dismount. Those darn East Germans.

Now my hair is layered pretty choppy so my ends are not always even. It is important to go all the way to the ends or you will not have a smooth curled look. If you need to, on your uneven parts, you can begin to twist earlier to get all hairs fully enclosed.

I have no idea what I just said.
Again, go all the way to the root...and look up toward the heavens like you are in deep thought and pondering something heavy.
And gently pull the curl downward.
NOTE -- IF your hair does not hold curl well at all, I spray each section as it is on the iron. Do not go all crazy, but just a decent spray before you pull it down out of the iron.

Now at this time, IJ entered the bathroom. He got a sitter and was taking me on a hot date so he was gonna hop in the shower so he could smell all good and try to seduce me.
HOW CAN ONE NOT NOTICE THE CAMERA?
He asks, You about ready? Hey look, this beauty DOES NOT come naturally. It takes HOURS for me to look descent enough for public consumption.
Uhm, I cropped this for you all. I know you wanted Indiana Jones: Behind the Scenes. But I do NOT think this is what you had in mind. Anyhoo...this takes about 10 - 15 minutes to complete. I pull one section down at a time as I need it.
And I save the top until the end.
Now bangs are a controversial subject and I say wear em like you like em. I am an 80's girl at heart, so I curl them. Please don't judge me. Plus I have an EXTREMELY large forehead. And a pointy chin. And small lips. But that is just from the neck up...there are WAY more issues below. My hair dresser uses a Chi and straightens them...to each their own. Or there are many ways to skin a cat. Anyhoo, that is it. Finished. To make it have a more polished look I VERY GENTLY shake it JUST A LITTLE to loosen the curls. And I really need to spray and straighten out those bangs.
Then spray it as little or much as needed. And I kinda cruch it as I spray in...but just a little. If you sprayed each individual section along the way, then very little is needed.
Now if you have really fine hair or want to be a TV evangelist on TBN {my secret desire} you might want to tease it a little to add volume and height.

Then spray and finger style.

AFTER YOU HAVE CURLED NEVER BRUSH OR COMB OUT THE CURLS. If you do this it will make it look hot rolled. I pulled on my nags to take away the 2nd grader look.
Then that is it. 15 minutes max.
Then go on a hot date. You can tell I really dressed up. It was dinner and a movie {Tropic Thunder} and Starbucks...Lover of my soul. I will post a few date pics so you can see how it looks a couple hours after fixin.

See? Embarassingly easy. Does this help? Is this what you all wanted. I know...too many pics of me...Sorry. And I think I caught a few flies with my mouth opened the WHOLE time. Sick-o.